My deepest apologies to the beautiful Segonku

Something very terrible happened to me coming home from work Wednesday night. I haven't cried so hard about something in years. As a lot of you know, skunks are my favorite animal. Do I need say more? Can you imagine what might have happened? I have never hit an animal before on the road, save for once, which was a very low flying bird. And I cried about that too, that morning. But hitting this beautiful little skunk was far worse than anything I could have imagined. I have always sort of judged people that, when asked how they hit an animal, said "it just ran right in front of my car" and claim they could not have avoided it. I always thought that they could have, if they had just tried hard enough or swerved right. I was wrong. I did the only thing I could to keep from hitting this little segonku ( native american name for skunk) in an even worse way......I drove straight. If I had swerved to the right or to the left I would have run right over it, like actually OVER it with a tire. Because the sweet little skunk fluffed from across the OTHER lane of oncoming traffic, not from my side. And he didn't hesitate or pause to run DIRECTLY into my car! My car is so loud, you think he would have backed up.......or stopped. But it was as though he was committing suicide. This made everything far more difficult to figure out in that last moment. And it probably was all because I had GLANCED down to change my radio station. I hate even admitting that, but I SWEAR THAT EVEN IF I HAD BEEN LOOKING UP EVERY SINGLE MILLISECOND BEFOREHAND....it might have been even worse. I could have driven all my tires RIGHT OVER HIM while trying to swerve or driven into a ditch or flipped my car on top of him. But I looked away for that millisecond and when I looked up all I could think was.....(since he was just inches from my oncoming car)...GO STRAIGHT. Which I did, and so the center of my car went directly over him, and I think he would have been just fine if he just would have ducked his little head down. But instead, I heard that small bump. And even a small bump from a car going 45mph to the head of a small skunk is most likely fatal. After I heard it I sure hoped it was because I didn't want him to just be suffering!!!! And it really was just a smooth little bump from my oil pan or something under my car. But I was in so much disbelief and horror, I did not know what to do. I wanted to turn around....but I was alone and so so sad and scared. I knew my tires had not gone over him, and that he might just be injured and not dead, but I DID NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO!

And so I just screamed, and started sobbing, yelling "WHY?!!!!!!!!!!" Over and over and over again. And I was SCREAMING "Oh God I am so sorry, little skunk I am so sorry" over and over again in between completely out of control sobs. It was horrible. I don't know really how I was driving at that point (this was right outside of Coloma) but I was praying to God " Oh God please forgive me....please let me forgive myself...I am so sorry....WHY?!!!!!!!!!!!!" I was screaming these thing out loud....so loud. Perhaps my voice was audible to passerby cars....I don't know. All I know is by the time I was to the State Park area in Coloma there was a car RIGHT ON MY ASS. And by the shape of the headlights I was pretty sure it was a cop. I was so pissed. Because now I thought I was going to get pulled over, and this was worrying me and interrupting my screaming/crying session and I had to calm a bit down. I was so so mad. But then he just wouldn't pull me over, and he wouldn't GET OFF MY ASS, so I just started screaming and crying again and this time yelling "GET THE HELL OFF MY ASS!!!!!!!!!!" in between sobs. Cause let me tell you, even a few miles after I turned onto 49, he was RIGHT ON MY BUTT still. Finally, I was so pissed at him (and starting to wonder if it EVEN really WAS a cop) and knowing I had all the proper paperwork and he had no reason to pull me over really....that I just pulled over to the side of the road, to let him pass. Sure enough, the car pulled over too.

I wasn't worried at all. I was just sobbing. And I could see his spotlight, from near his driver window, so at that point I knew it was a cop. Through my driver side mirror I could see a figure walk up to my car ( and I was still BAWLING).....and then I heard his voice, very kindly.."Hello there. I just want to make sure everything is alright. Is everything OK? " ?????????????????????? I was a baffled mess. How did he know anything? Since when do cops approach windows of cars saying such things? It was seriously so odd. But all I could blurt out was ...." No! I just hit a skunk and they are my favorite animal!!!...." and I was sobbing, not even looking at him. And I could tell that immediately he knew he was getting more than he'd asked for and probably wished he'd never followed me (CAUSE I WAS A COMPLETE WRECK)....but at the same time he seemed endeared. He started telling me "Oh....hey....ya know, it happens. Don't take it so hard....it's happened to me so many times when I have to get somewhere fast....Where did you hit it at?" And I told him "Right before Coloma" and he said "Are skunks really your favorite animal? More than a deer?" And I said, still crying "Well I never hit a deer before so I don't know but I just REALLY love skunks" and he just kept saying "Awww...it's Ok, don't take it so hard...." And finally I glanced up at him, brave enought to bare my red teary face and saw that he was like 25! Just a young one! Anyhoo....in my time of need this stranger-cop actually helped my feeling so terrible, even if just a little. It was so odd. And finally he just said "OK. Well how far do you have to go?" And " Drive safe....I don't want anyone to side swipe you with your lights like that...." I think he meant my headlights because the driver side one is not secure and kind of bounces around, due to an old accident Heather got in when the LeBaron was her car.

So I started up my crying again and bawled the whole way home. I just wanted to get home so bad...and crawl into Art's arms so he could rock me like a baby. I knew that if I walked into the house without saying anything direct that he would think something REALLY REALLY REALLY horrible (like a human death) had happened, so as I pulled up to the house I resolved that I would walk in and declare "I hit a skunk" and then go through with all the tears and wailing....so as to not scare Arty too bad. Which is precisely what I did. I just didn't want to talk about it all. I only wanted to cry. That was the longest drive home ever. And after my declaration, I just climbed into Art's arms and bawled and bawled and bawled. Until every tear was gone.

And that's my terrible story. I hope I never have to tell one like it again. I think the reason I cried so much is because I think so much. I think too much probably. And I kept thinking how that little skunk was about the same size as Grabby and Owl and JUST AS ALIVE as them, with life in his little eyes and his nightly business to go about. And I thought about why people who hit animals didn't go to jail. And how I deserved to go to jail. And I thought about that skunk's little fluffy figure waddling across the empty highway, and pretty fast, RIGHT INTO MY CAR. I just kept thinking about the same things, over and over and over. When I woke up yesterday, my eyelids were as big as jellyfish, all bloated and funny looking. But the crying part was over, and I decided to try some skunk therapy. So yesterday, for quite some time, I decided to research more about skunks and pet skunks. I can't wait to have one. This Christmas, I want a pet skunk look alike stuffed animal that has long fur and everything and could ALMOST be a real skunk.

Skunks are legal as house pets in some states, but not California. They are legal in Oregon. They are legal in Florida. You can look on wikipedia and see which states they are legal in. Skunks sound like they are amazing house pets. They get their stinker removed when they are very small, and if you hold them and cuddle them oft when they are small, they can be just as amiable and fun and cuddly as cats. And they like cats too. I am going to post a video of a skunk named Petunia. Petunia is with a cat friend. Many people have a great love of skunks and run shelters for them (in other states) and have many of them for pets. This photo is of a man that helps run a shelter for skunks feeding them popcorn. The word skunk comes from the Abenaki language and is a corruption of the word segonku. Say that 10 times fast and you'll see what I mean.



There are many kinds of skunks.
And baby skunks.
Petunia!
Baby skunks.

And this one is effing heart wrenching. But it gives you a true taste of how much love there is for skunks in one's heart. Make sure watch it til the end....( I wasn't so fond of the slow-mo part)